yknow how some guys are like normal looking, and then they grow a beard and they’re like hot and bad ass? these guys did that. and don’t worry you facial hair loving people, part two, best mustaches in movies will be coming soon.

10. the amityville horror
beard-wearer: james brolin
beard-style: the wet-it and forget-it
ryan reynolds tried to remake brolin’s beard in the remake of the movie, but failed miserably. the shining star of the original amityville was definitely the brolin beard. all full, masculine, bushy, and totally tough.

9. castaway
beard-wearer: tom hanks
beard-style: the freedom beard
tom hanks is on an island for a while so he decides it’s the perfect opportunity to grow that beard he always dreamed of having. and he goes from zero to hero with that jumble of fleece on his face.

8. die hard
beard-wearer: hart bochner
beard-style: the “i got this, guys”
although hans gruber’s beard has a better track-record than that of harry ellis, it’s that beard (and the coke) that gives him that super suave confidence to hit on the wife of john mcclane and risk his life by thinking he’s even cooler than the terrorists. because of that beard.

7. serpico
beard-wearer: al pacino
beard-style: the velvet hipster
whoa did you ever think al pacino could be this attractive? the beard makes the stud.

6. kill bill vol. 2 / jackie brown
beard-wearer: pai mei / samuel l. jackson
beard-style: the mortar kombat / the DIY dingleberry
quentin tarantino loves people having ridiculous facial hair in his movies. it’s funny. right? …right?

5. jumanji
beard-wearer: robin williams
beard-style: the “face matches the fist”
robin williams with a tricentennial man beard. rugged and wild animal provoking.

4. what about bob?
beard-wearer: richard dreyfuss
beard-style: the career retaining fuzz
dreyfuss killed hollywood with that well-groomed petite little beard of his. in movies such as this movie, and jaws, and um… krippendorf’s tribe? but then he shaved it i think. and now he’s not in movies much. i miss him!

3. nighthawks
beard-wearer: sly stallone
beard-style: the velvet hipster plus flavor saver
the face of sly stallones sassy masculine take on linda richman. TUFF!

2. the stepfather
beard-wearer: terry o’quinn
beard-style: the rugged witness protection
lockes beard only has a three minute cameo in the movie before being shaved off into oblivion. but while it’s around, it’s quite beautiful.

1. angels in america
beard-wearer: meryl streep
beard-style: the face torah
a face full of elderly pubes never looked so sleek.

*honorable mention for being the worst beard in a movie: away we go
beard-wearer: john krasinski
beard-style: the “someone shit on my face” aka “the mistake” aka the “i dare you to like me”
the award for you grew an indie beard for an indie movie so it could all be so indie is for john krasinski. nice try.