you’ve all seen gran torino. clint eastwood is one old crazy motherfucker in that. now lets take a look at the old dudes that inspired that brave performance.
10. grandpa abe vigoda
movie: look who’s talking
level of craziness: totes senile
grandpa is super old and crazy. he talks shit to his orderlies and demands more chocolate bars and stuff. because his orderlies are stealing his candy… or so he thinks! he has crazy eyebrows, which talking baby mikey finds quite peculiar. oh and he pooped himself. i think. :(
9. jud crandall
movie: pet semetary
level of craziness: pretty aware of his surroundings
scary old wise man herman munster is like “no family! dont go down there!” but they dont listen. and then the most adorable child actor ever, miko hughes is back to kill and he knew this was coming! thats why hes there! to warn them! but in the end, he dies too. and its totally not his fault.
8. coleman
movie: trading places
level of craziness: nah. just obedient.
being a butler is super hard when youre an old guy, i imagine. but hes always down to fuck shit up. he goes with every plan hes told to. first, he respectfully ditches his employer and butlers for the random black dude. then when theyre like “hey, we gotta get back at those dudes for what they did to us”, hes like “lemme just set up this rifle and get my priest costume from the closet”. whattaguy.
7. mr. mertle
movie: the sandlot
level of craziness: more zany than crazy i suppose
no, no you’re right. that photo isnt from the sandlot at all. but there are baseball players in it so its close enough. one would think living all blind and cooped up in a dirty shack with a huge beast dog would drive someone crazy. but hes just looking for pals to hang with. so much so that hes willing to give away his super awesome signed baseball just to get some respect. well i respect him. thats a hard life.
6. farmer arthur hoggett
movie: babe
level of craziness: does being in love with a pig make you crazy?
few men have spoken words more gently than james cromwell. he hangs with his favorite little pig who does in fact talk, but not to him. he doesnt care. he gets that pig. they get each other. theyre best friends. and its cute. and i think that makes james cromwell pretty crazy.
5. brother theodore
movie: the ‘burbs
level of craziness: you are who you hang with
brother theodore is the silent threat when it comes to his scary ass family. theyre all pretty crazy. while his brother
henry gibson is outwardly being a crazy old dude, brother theodore just sits back and chills. and hes quite intimidating if i say so myself!
4. the grandpa
movie: the lost boys
level of craziness: he just doesnt give a fuck
grandpa takes ‘er easy when everyone else is like “oh shit! vampires!”. thats because hes been around for a century and yeah, hes seen fucking vampires. he cant sell his house because of those goddamn vampires. so hell just drink a cold one and save the day when need be.
3. frank
movie: cliffhanger
level of craziness: i’d suggest meds but i’m no doctor
has anyone noticed in the opening scene of cliffhanger? like for realz, noticed him? the chick is falling to her death and he cant wipe the shit eating grin off his face. i just want to know if the director was like “please! give me SOME type of expression besides that! ugh. fuck it” well this makes ralph waite the happiest old dude i think ive ever seen.
2. ben wickets, pro carver
movie: the pumpkin karver
level of craziness: yeah hes fucking crazy
you probably havent seen this. but you can watch for
proof in my most popular youtube video of all time. dude is the worst actor, maybe ever? its like he got one take with each shot and fuck it up or not, theyre using it. you cant understand a word he says. it sounds like hes always saying ninja. oh and he refers to stabbing as sticking. hes a crazy old man.
1. emmett brown
movie: back to the future
level of craziness: one of the more insane people in the world
doc brown is a scientist inventor. so natch, he has to be a little crazy. but doc is a lot crazy. although he can be a little abrasive and intense, and even sometimes a little irritating and overly passionate, everyone would still want him to be their grandpa. because he’d know when you were about to mess up your own kids lives, and he’d come in and FIX THAT SHIT!
*honorable mention: i guess the whole cast
movie: grumpy old men
level of craziness: hey, theyre just crazy for snatch
a bunch of old dudes, everywhere in this movie. walter matthau, jack lemmon, and burgess meredith to be exact. theyre all old and wrinkly and infested with dementia. but theyre cute. and theyre just what you think of when you think of crazy old dudes. old and crazy and competitive and love to fish.
my favorite director as of this minute of today is steve miner. i love to make things, drink too much, angrily debate about horror movies, happily discuss full house, and buy home decor and clothing with animals on them. wolves and kittens mostly. i also love thousand island, the movie zapped (and the soundtrack), and keith david. and despite all this, i was really popular in high school!
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what about the old man from roadtrip?
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Crazy for snatch. Lovely. :)
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how do you forget henry gibson in the 'burbs?
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